Spiritual Practices for a Long Winter
Hi friends,
I hope you’re doing okay! (Truly, I hope you’re doing better than okay, but I feel like the most any of us can hope for in 2020 is simply okay.) I am…okay. This has been such a best of times / worst of times year for me. I paraded this all over social media a few weeks ago, but in case you didn’t see, I’m writing a book! I was at first worried about trying to write a book during these very strange times, but it turns out that my brain loves a sprawling project to latch on to and so it's been okay so far. It’s been a real bright spot for me this year amid all the difficulties of adjusting to COVID life and dealing with election anxiety/climate change anxiety/regular anxiety. I’m excited to be spending the next year writing something beautiful for you, and I’ll be just as excited to share it when it’s ready.
As we head into what is sure to be a particularly long winter, I wanted to share some spiritual/religious practices I’m putting into place for myself and my family that will hopefully help us weather the season. I never took seasonal depression seriously until we moved to NYC a few years ago and I quickly discovered that, lo and behold, I am one of those people who gets seasonal depression. My anxiety always ramps up during the winter, and I’m much more prone to sadness/blues/pessimism/despair. My usual coping mechanisms―church, museums, a full social calendar, travelling to see family―are not available to me, thanks to COVID, so I’m trying to be proactive about creating lots of little rituals for the dark season.
Reverencing the Dead Tomorrow is All Souls’ Day, a day of prayer and remembrance for those who have died. We’ve all spent this year surviving a pandemic, among other things, and have likely spent a lot more time thinking about our own mortality than we are wont to do. (Maybe I’m projecting here.) I’m going to try to carry the spirit of All Souls’ through the winter, praying for the saints and asking them to pray for me and praying for the dead and asking them to pray for me. I’ll be praying the rosary for loved ones who have died, and I’m going to try to gather photos of them to keep around. I’m also going to keep Death cards from some of my favorite tarot decks on my little micro altar spaces at home. For me, the tarot’s Death card is a good memento mori, and meditating on it softens some of my fear of death. Death is not the end, and I think that the dead are not so far from us as we sometimes imagine them to be. I think that making space in our lives and homes for loved ones who have died and for remembering the fleetingness of life is a way to quell some of the loneliness of the long winter and give myself perspective.
Celebrating the SaintsUsually, one of my best practices for getting through the winter is being intentional about seeing people―museum dates with friends, having people over for dinner often, planning many playdates because an apartment full of children is a happy apartment. This winter we can’t safely see as many people as we would usually like to see, and so instead I’m leaning into the communion of saints and the cloud of witnesses. Today is All Saint’s Day, a day to celebrate all saints―the ones we know and the ones we don’t. I’ve been wanting to do a better job celebrating saints’ feast days here at home, and this winter seems like a good time to do so! It helps me feel less lonely, and it gives us an excuse to have small celebrations during the dreary winter weather. I’ll share more about this as I do it, but I’m planning on researching traditional practices for celebrating feast days and trying to get some good traditions going here.
Saint Michael the Archangel I’ve cultivated a real devotion to Saint Michael this year. I like keeping him close during the winter months especially. His feast day is September 29th, and so he sort of ushers in the shorter days. Saint Michael is best known for casting Satan out of heaven, defeating the forces of darkness, and so I think it makes sense to view him as a present protector during the long winter season. Saint Michael has also, sort of weirdly, become a patron saint of my anxiety. I’m an immensely high-strung person, and one thing I’ve found that helps when I feel a wave of panic coming on is praying the Saint Michael prayer:
St. Michael the Archangel, defend us in battle. Be our defense against the wickedness and snares of the Devil. May God rebuke him, we humbly pray, and do thou, O Prince of the heavenly hosts, by the power of God, thrust into hell Satan, and all the evil spirits, who prowl about the world seeking the ruin of souls. Amen.
I’m aware that it’s maybe not politically correct to talk about anxiety as a sort of spiritual attack, but that is often what it feels like for me. I take care of my mental health in many different ways: I have a therapist I talk to every week, I’m currently taking an extended break from alcohol, I make sure I get enough exercise and enough sleep and enough time outside, I take my vitamins, I’m not currently on medication but it’s not something I’ve ruled out, etc etc. But prayer helps too, and the Saint Michael prayer helps especially with the waves of sadness I get in the wintertime. Is this kind of dramatic? Yes. Do I care? Absolutely not, the whole Christian religion lives for drama.
Home LifeI’ve never been very big on stuff. We live in a very small apartment, and we don’t have much room for things here. But we haven’t been going to church regularly because of COVID, and so our home is more centered in our faith life than it’s ever been. I’ve been making an effort to make it feel more that way. I’ve been buying candles and icons and religious books for the kids. It means our apartment is a little more cluttered than I would usually like for it to be, but I’ve found it surprisingly cozy. My faith is the central part of my life, and so you’d think I’d be good at doing day-to-day faith formation with my children, but...I am not. I find it easy to let daily family prayer slip, and I’ve definitely let it slip over the last six months or so. Our routines, like everyone’s routines, fell to pieces in the spring, and family prayer got lost in the chaos. We’re trying to pick it back up now, and we’re starting small, with a short compline at night before bed, and reading about the saints on their feast days. We’ll do more as we’re able, but I think it’s a good start to a cozy winter routine, one that brings us together at the end of each day.
This, along with a light therapy lamp and lots of vitamin D and getting outside as much as possible, is how I’m planning to get myself through this winter. I would genuinely love to know what you’re doing this winter to keep yourselves safe and sane and grounded. Please chat with me about it! Tell me what saints you’re loving especially, tell me what winter feast days feel special for you, tell me what prayers you’re praying and what spiritual practices you’re sustaining and how you’re getting through this winter. <3